TWENTY JOKES FOR WOMEN

TWENTY JOKES FOR WOMEN

Mummy, what happens when a car gets too old and rusty to work?
Someone sells it to your father.

How many men does it take to change a loo roll?
We don’t know, it’s never happened.

How do men sort their laundry?
Filthy, and filthy but wearable.

What did God say after creating man?
I can do better.

What is the thinnest book in the world?
What Men Know About Women.

What is a man’s idea of helping with the housework?
Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.

What does a man consider a seven-course meal?
A hot dog and a six-pack of beer.

Wife: Where do you want to go on holiday this year?
Husband: Somewhere I’ve never been before.
Wife: How about the kitchen?

Why does a man have a clean conscience?
Because it’s never used.

What’s the difference between a man and a yogurt?
A yogurt has culture.

What do you call a man who supports a woman’s career, helps prepare dinner,
bathes the children and earns a six figure income?
Darling.

What’s a man’s idea of a romantic evening?
A candlelit football stadium.

What did the experts of the Nineties discover that could do the work of ten men?
A woman.

What has an IQ of seven?
Eight men.

What’s the difference between men and batteries?
Batteries have a positive side.

How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
Both of them.

What’s the difference between a man and ET?
ET phones home.

How do men exercise at the beach?
Suck their stomach in every time they see a bikini.

When is the only time a woman can change a man?
When he’s a baby.

How do you make a man happy?
Who cares?